Come one, come all!
1/27 - The Overwrite
This trip... This relationship... It's unlike the previous one. I'm now more involved in our future and all that is to come. In a way, I'm making more grown-up decisions. He would ask his mom for permission, on whether I could move in to live with him and his family, until - well, of course - my tourist VISA expires. If his mom denies me entry to her house, then no biggie, for we have plans to rent a house, split the cost and elope together. But who knows? He might just marry me and I'd get to live with him forever! One can only dream... yet I remain hopeful, even after what I've been through.
Let's put it this way - this relationship is less sly and sneaky, and more thoroughly thought out. I would work and find a job for 8-9 months, from January 2014 to mid-September 2014. That way, however much I earn would be used to fund my trip and expenses while abroad. Of course, I'd have to allocate a reasonable sum of money to my reserve, so I can return home after my 3-6 months stay over there in 'murica (depending on the situation and length of allowed stay by the U.S. immigration peeps).
Also, David's not a freeloader. He works, so that's a plus! He drives to work everyday (yes, he can drive!) and his interests are mainly video games, which is something I - myself - am not a stranger to. I've practically spent one-third of my life indulging in gaming and MMORPG's.
So that's just an update on how my life's situations has been going thus far - pretty good, if I do say so myself. I've paved a way, a new beginning, one that I've deemed a fruitful and worthy road to pursue. Truth be told, I did - in fact - need the well-deserved 2-3 months break-from-reality that I've gotten while in Canada. It cleared my head and made me less edgy and calmed my angst. It's not a rumor that everyone here in Singapore is constantly trying to beat the clock. They would spend every minute of their lives preoccupying themselves with some sort of activity just so they can feel like their day hasn't gone to waste. And for a period of time, I fell into the whole crazed illusion that life is indeed short and everyday has to be seized, if not, it'll feel like life has no purpose or meaning whatsoever.
That explains my possessiveness and obsessive behavior towards a person I'd taken an interest to. But no more, for lately, my boyfriend has inexplicably taught me a valuable lesson, one that has made me reevaluate my entire life style. I'm more relaxed and calm in nature, and I would now grant him space because he has declared his love to me. I need no further validation, because I vow to trust him wholeheartedly.
Even though I'm right back where I've started, I stand tall and unafraid of the choices I've made in life. Listen up! I'd indubitably pick being where I am today, than living a mediocre life dictated by people who believe in the system that is how our dull and boring society has conditioned us to believe... at least here in Singapore.
You know, I have this habit of straying from the point of each blog post - probably because I always get my strength from expressing my inner most thoughts and once I start writing, words just keep pouring out uncontrollably. Now, back to the main reason for this post.
As a person, each time a significant event happens in my crazy, messed up life, I tend to associate that particular moment with a song. So the next time the same song comes up, I'll reminisce and relive that phase of my life that I once experienced, and often fade into a daydream, but that's not what I'm talking about.
I guess what I'm trying to say is that there are moments in my past relationship where I've carved too deep a mark in my heart, and I've accompanied it with a song to go along with each smile-worthy moments with him, that it may very well be impossible to mend. Which is why, I'm planning to overwrite it with new, vibrant events that David and I share. Hence, the title of this post.
Monday, January 27, 2014
Monday, January 27, 2014